Things the Cemetery Office Knows Families Usually Discover Too Late

There is a sequence of events that tends to recur in any cemetery office throughout the USA, and the scene is usually similar. A family enters several weeks after the death took place armed with folders full of printer output, prepared to talk markers. A particular style and design, verse was chosen and a measurement of the plot was done with a tape purchased in the local hardware store. And it is precisely this very moment the manager pulls up a laminated document – cemetery marker regulations. At least a half of all of the ideas suddenly become impossible.

There is nothing wrong about this process in general. No one is ever taught the rules and regulations of cemetery management in college. Just like probate is learned abruptly and during grief.

Thus let me give you the things the person sitting behind the desk knows, as having them in mind helps change what you spend and how long you wait.

The plot determines the kind of the stone not vice versa

Cemeteries are not neutral spaces. Each cemetery has its particular code of conduct and rules which are usually aimed at making work easier for maintenance team. A lawn-style cemetery (the one without any interruptions on the green grass surface) requires necessarily the use of the flush marker, which the mower can pass straight over. Other old sections as well as church cemeteries tend to accept upright markers. Some cemeteries accept uprights only in particular rows. Other impose limitations regarding height (like the requirement for a particular stone not to exceed the 36 inch limit). Even a concrete foundation might be obligatory in certain cemeteries to be poured only by cemetery workers for some additional costs.

In this sense, the rational approach implies following particular sequence of actions: contact the cemetery first of all, get written information concerning marker specifications then start looking for grave markers.

Asking the manager to provide you with following four pieces of information is absolutely necessary. Maximum dimensions, base/foundation, allowed height, if vases are permitted, if raised or flush vases can be used and lastly, the setting fee which is charged by cemetery, not by any other organization involved in manufacture of your stone.

Those fees which are not quoted up front

The cost of median adult funeral with viewing and burial according to the NFDA study in the General Price List reached $8,300, or $9,995 with a vault (the figure for a funeral with cremation is $6,280). These prices are associated with funeral homes which do not include plot and marker cost in their prices. That means that in case of purchasing marker the budget conversation has been made in advance and did not lead to satisfaction.

And it helps to explain why grave marker prices vary from few hundred dollars for an ordinary flush granite marker to several thousands for complete upright with sculpture. Granite marker with a carved cross costs several hundreds, the similar beveled piece with carved borders costs a little bit higher – in high hundreds. Slant markers usually cost mid-high hundreds and low thousands and finally full upright with religious carving – more than three thousands. That is quite a wide variation based just on the size and labor needed to make it.

Also, there is the trend developing in this market segment. According to the projections made by NFDA American cremation rate reached 63.4% in 2025, while the rate of burial is 31.6%. By 2045 it is expected that cremation rate will reach 82.3%. Cremation does not eliminate the need of having a marker, it just changes it: small markers, companion markers and niche plaques are more popular now.

The reason behind the lack of color chart and why it is good thing

Do not expect to be presented with paint chart in a monument workshop showroom. This kind of shops has a limited variety of granites – black, grey and red – for a definite reason. These granites have high density, low porosity, survive freezing-thawing and the lettering remains legible for generations rather than few decades.

Marble is beautiful on photos but erodes in real life; sandstone wears away with time; cheap and rapidly aging concrete is a bad choice as well. Granite turned out to be the best stone type after centuries of experiments.

Finally, black granite is the only suitable stone type for laser portrait etching.

Timeline can be quite harmful

However, nobody tells you this: there is no law requiring quick placing of the marker in the particular place. Many families are waiting for many months or even up to one year for placing the stone. There is nothing bad about such a delay because the soil becomes more stable, grief is not so strong in a few months.

But if you do not want the installation to take too much time, ask for the particular period of completion. A clear promise of making a stone within 60 days from the time of ordering is a definite one. The ambiguous “in spring time” is not a commitment. Shops, which have large enough stock of granite materials in this country are the ones who make promises and honor them.

Also, make sure you receive the information about the procedures in case of damage of your stone. The perfect answer is repair or replacement without additional payment. Any other variant would mean that the risk belongs to you.

Ordering stone when there is no showroom next door

Modern Americans rarely live in the same place where their parents are going to be buried. Thus, the phenomenon of online memorial ordering became common and natural in last years.

It works properly in case you insist on few important things. Getting of 3D rendering or scaled image before making is mandatory, you should get revisions till proper engraving layout (lettering in stone has completely different proportions compared to the screen). You should ensure that the engraving is included to the contract and not quoted after the production process and also, whether the shipping costs are included.

You also should not be afraid to ask questions concerning installation procedure of your grave marker, since most of the workshops only produce stones and coordinate the local setters rather than employ setting staff everywhere (as honest manufacturers would tell you in advance).

In addition, financing plays crucial role in this business as well. Common practice to have interest-free pre-need orders for up to 36 months, during which the stone remains in storage and the prices are frozen is quite usual. Veterans and first responders may count on discount and families purchasing two stones (very common situation when spouses plan ahead) have more chances to reduce costs.

All of this would not make your purchase easy but it allows to survive this month without difficult year spent on corrections and refunds.

If you are planning to purchase a grave marker soon and wish to find out how much it costs without going to showrooms, please look through the catalog on the website of Capital Grave Markers taking your cemetery’s regulation paper next to you.